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My relationship with my mom is not the best, I don't even want there to be a relationship with my mom at this point. She did enough damage to me during my childhood that I ended up being permanently messed up and now she's trying to be involved with my life again through my sister. Honestly, I think that I need therapy or counselling or something to fix me. The main problem is that I think people are more interested in offering help to children (I went to a lot of counselling when I was a kid, it didn't help much because I didn't know what the problem was so talking about it didn't help) or when you're an adult who outwardly screams that they need help. I rarely ever ask for help, so most people don't see me suffering in silence, waking up in the middle of the night because I had a nightmare on a regular basis.

I remember being raped when I was a child, though I'm trying my best to forget the memory. I remember the location (vaguely) but I don't remember the person who raped me. I do remember when the traumatic memory that I believe I repressed came into my mind and I had a panic attack as the memory played and I was once again a scared little boy in a room with a person I had no reason to distrust up to that point.

I also remember something that a portion of the newer generation of autistic people don't. I was sent to a hospital for evaluation, which was more of a psychological aspect of my development than anything. Nothing says "You're different than other people" like staying in a hospital for a few weeks with bars on the windows and locks on the doors. My room was next to a room with padded walls where unruly children were sent to calm down. So, I would often hear the children in the hospital banging against the walls and screaming until they eventually passed out. People still don't understand autism, but when I was a kid I was still in the period where different experimental treatments were being used to treat me and monitor my condition. I've had a number of MRIs when I was a kid, a number of bloodtests and I was briefly in an educational video on autistic adults that some people made for a University project.

I also remember being prescribed a number of pills and seeing a number of psychologists, none of which worked. The only reason people were interested in me as a kid was because I attempted suicide. What doctor wouldn't want the opportunity to help a depressed autistic child who attempted to kill himself?

I feel so much anger sometimes, but I don't know who to be angry towards. Myself, the part of society that made me the way I am or the part of society that doesn't care about people like me. The kind of people who are more than happy to sweep me under the rug and ignore me until I start screeching like a monkey, then they stare at me for a few minutes as a person might stare at a zoo animal.

Recent Game Medals

Lights Out! 5 Points Guerrilla Radio! Medal Stats.
Anacusis 5 Points On the bright side, you don't have to hear Bieber anymore. Medal Stats.
Colour Perception Impaired 5 Points Now you won't have to feel guilty about having a colour advantage. Medal Stats.
Hotwheels 5 Points You ain't got nothing on Fredrick Brennan! Medal Stats.
Here, let me get that for you! 5 Points It'd be bad if someone felt inferior because they were challenged. Medal Stats.
Lieutenant Dan 5 Points "It's time for a showdown! You and me! I'm right here!" Medal Stats.
Saved in the Nick of Time! 5 Points Got euthanized 'cause there already were too many at the shelter. Medal Stats.
Jump Man 5 Points Jumping is a privilege, not a right. Medal Stats.
SECRET MEDAL 50 Points Unlock this medal to see it's details. Medal Stats.
SECRET MEDAL 50 Points Unlock this medal to see it's details. Medal Stats.

Total Medals Earned: 81 (From 24 different games.)